Meh

Ruffles are in they tell me. And what about this tight dress. It makes me nervous to eat or sit or just breathe in it. The color is correctly called Orchid and it would be perfect for the Easter Egg hunt at the White House. Ooh but don't bend down because this thing will wrinckle like MAD. Its called a Gladiator Dress. Made of silk/spandex stretch charmeuse and its designed by Marc Bower. $550.

The 80's are totally BACK!

Ok but excuse me I freakin' WORE both of these dresses many, MANY times in every color of the rainbow back in the mid to late 80's. Shoot even the early 90's. It blew my mind to see both represented so faithfully here. The same seams, the same floppy limp bow, Jesus the same off-the-shoulder thing!! Run for your lives!! And its gone up, pay $330.00 for this red silk bow dress and $178 for the black and white number with the shawl collar. Ew.

I'm a Present - get it?

Yeah because I love the idea of having this big freakin' bow in my midsection - super flattering and sexy. You're jealous I can tell. You wish you bought this MARC BY MARC JACOBS Cotton Twill Bow Dress for $568. Cause nothing says formal like twill.

Mother of the Bride

It just goes to show you that you can spend alot of money on designer clothes, and still look like my Mother. Or Liz Taylor during the fat turban wearing days. It is described as: Black with silvertone beaded detail. Ballerina neckline. Cape sleeves. Cascade ruffles. Pure silk chiffon. Made in the USA. Yes it's CAPE sleeves. Awesome. Plus its made in the US of A. Only $2790.00.

Hell bent for Leather

I often wonder where I could find a leather dress. Who doesn't? And here is the answer to my prayers, in black leather no less. Allow the awesomeness of the official description to wash over you: "MARC BY MARC JACOBS Leather Funnel Neck Dress. Short-sleeve shift dress is cut from buttery-soft leather and is secured by an edgy exposed zipper at the back. A dramatic, face-framing funnel neck and seamed dropped waist complete the futuristic look." Face Framing...isn't that sweet? pick this up for $828.00.

Ruffles Have Ridges

Its the holiday party season and everyone is shopping for that perfect little black dress, am I right? How about this fancy dress - its a Marc Jacobs Organza Ruffled Dress on sale for $398. The detail is hard to see on this beauty, but at the top above al the ruffles is a nice big bow. Lie down under the tree for full effect here. Although if you are pregnant or top heavy you could conceal that nicely.

Well I'll Be Dipped... In Silver

Sometimes I have a problem with the whole set up of photo. Like with this one. The beehive hair-doo they have the model in is too much. I also think the model might have a tumor or implant gone awry in her butt. The one cheek is HUGE and the other, not so much. I want to know what this material feels like, it looks so silky and cooly metallic. The cowl neck in back is kinda 80's Dynasty retro. The whole look is something only Krystal Carrington could pull off. But for $220 this Oleg Cassini dress is quite the holiday bargain.

Skinny Orange

For the record, I'm trying NOT to poke fun at the models. I mean, they aren't wearing clothes from their personal collections or anything, they are working. And the pressure to be thin must be outrageous. But this dress on this model is very very bad. Orange like a pumpkin, but the model is a skinny waif who looks like she might fall over in a stiff breeze. Maybe this size 00 dress is just to darn big. Or maybe she hasn't eaten in about a week. Seriously, this girl might need help. What designer would look at their dress on this model and not be pissed. Orange is so flattering on blondes. Grab this Chloe silk organza dress for $2,280.

This would look great under a blacklight

Sometimes a dress comes around that is just fine and dandy in design, as is this one. Who would have a problem with a classic halter dress in silk. Of course, the design ON the fabric is crazy-bright. I remember bean bag chairs in this pattern and color. Sometimes black is the new black, and using a neon print is not the way to go. But it is a bargain at $260.