Jellies by Marc Jacobs

Oh wait! No I mean... Rubber round toe ballet flat with cut-out detail at toe and three small holes in vamp for ventilation. Rubber sole/upper. Available in Yellow. Made in Italy. MADE IN ITALY!!!!!! Jellies made in Italy. They come in other colors too, like aqua and smoke. No lie. I'm also not lying when I tell you these are on Sale down to $95 from $155.

toilet paper rosettes on your boobs

I'm deeply unimpressed. The description is outrageously optimistic...Ombre Silk chiffon Rosette Tube Dress "The only downside? The looks of envy we'll get from all the other girls at the party." 24" long, measured from center back.

OK its 24 inches from the center of the back. 24 inches is 2 rulers long to cover your butt. Yikes that is crazy short. $297.00

Yet Another Ripped and Wrinkled One...

What is up with the "I slept in my clothes" look these days? This dress also looks it was attacked by a lawnmower or something. All shredded and torn, it looks messy. You'll pay $1710.00 for this Fendi Silk Petal dress.

Lovely Plaid

Marc Jacobs thinks this dress is Nautical-inspired. How? Which part is nautical? The price is $368 for this silk dress. Land ho!

That's Mistress Rodeo To You

This sort of makes me think Ralph Lauren has a little bit of a fetish. Dig the black gloves and severe look. I guess this dress would look good on someone in somekind of situation but who and where would they go in it? A wedding maybe? To the office? Ralph charges $2598 for this.

Toilet Paper Squares

I couldn't help but think this one looked like TP squares stuck to a plain dress. But why just the front? Did they run out of patience with it? The model is a lovely woman and the color suits her but its not attractive or complimentary. If you are spending $4990.00 for this dress, the least they can do is finish the back.

More "Resort" Wear

Aren't these busy pants? What color shirt would you wear with these? Is that an elatic waist? Yikes. But still not too bad considering they are only $59.

The World's Worst Camel Toe

I passed this dress at first because it really didn't catch my eye as ugly per se. But then I realized that the stem of the flower on this dress looks like its in the exact center. You tell me, doesn't this give this poor model a simulated camel toe? And what is that behind her, in the space betwen her arm and her side? Is that a clip of some kind? When you pay $2435 for a Versace Calla Print Silk Dress, does the clip come gratis?