My Dress Won First Prize at the State Fair

Is it just me or is that thing on her shoulder - which they sweetly call a brooch detail - does it look like a blue ribbon? Also a strange detail is that this silk charmeuse dress has side pockets. As if that fabric could justify putting something in those pockets. Pluh-lease!! Good luck with that. $495.00

Ode to the Long Sweater

It has been amazingly hard to find expensive ugly clothes to rip on these last few weeks. My usual standby of looking though the cocktail dresses has turned up some super cute and mostly so-so garments. Ah but then I came upon this and my heart rejoiced! Philip Lim created this gray with green trim sweater. Deep V neckline. Puffed three-quarter sleeves. Patch pockets. Tonal belt at natural waist. Banded hem. Extra fine merino wool. Only $550. Get two.

Dolman Sleeves - the AGONY

Oh. My. God. Its a dolman sleeve. Look, that's super retro and all but, and I say this from personal experience, the dolman sleeve never looks that good after you've been wearing it in real life. It just makes you look like a box with wrinkled and dangly arm flab. But isn't this a pretty color? The cost is only $350 for this Elizabeth and James Blouson Silk Dress with a keyhole back.

I Found My Mom's Housedress

This "shift" dress has crossed a line somewhere into the dread housedress territory. I want to blame it on the pockets in the front - they are horrible and ill-placed. The color is very K-Mart circa 1978. Bleh. And its $288. Buy this at your own risk.

What blows my mind here is the exposed back zipper. Wow that is unsightly. Especially the way it stretches the sweater fabric in such an obvious way. Yuck. And I think the whole horizontal stripes thing is ugly. But maybe you have a $248 gift card and would love to pick this up.