What blows my mind here is the exposed back zipper. Wow that is unsightly. Especially the way it stretches the sweater fabric in such an obvious way. Yuck. And I think the whole horizontal stripes thing is ugly. But maybe you have a $248 gift card and would love to pick this up.

Tablecloth for a Shirt

Who is going to look good in this perfectly square shirt, with its horizontal plaid and crazy ruching at the neck? Maybe it would look better on a real live person instead of the cone head mannequin. It's a holiday steal at $159.

Ruffles Have Ridges

Its the holiday party season and everyone is shopping for that perfect little black dress, am I right? How about this fancy dress - its a Marc Jacobs Organza Ruffled Dress on sale for $398. The detail is hard to see on this beauty, but at the top above al the ruffles is a nice big bow. Lie down under the tree for full effect here. Although if you are pregnant or top heavy you could conceal that nicely.

This is a Member's Only jacket

The description of this $506 jacket says it's a "Classically styled motocross jacket takes a super-hip turn in metallic silver leather. Styled with zippered pockets at the chest and hips and snap-closure epaulets at the shoulders." PLEASE! Stop with the epaulets. Also this IS NOT a motocross jacket. Anyone who was alive and dressing themselves in the 80's knows exactly what this jacket it a copy of. Am I right?

More "Resort" Wear

Aren't these busy pants? What color shirt would you wear with these? Is that an elatic waist? Yikes. But still not too bad considering they are only $59.

The World's Worst Camel Toe

I passed this dress at first because it really didn't catch my eye as ugly per se. But then I realized that the stem of the flower on this dress looks like its in the exact center. You tell me, doesn't this give this poor model a simulated camel toe? And what is that behind her, in the space betwen her arm and her side? Is that a clip of some kind? When you pay $2435 for a Versace Calla Print Silk Dress, does the clip come gratis?

Disco Fever

I have a strange love hate relationship with sparkly items. I knew tube tops might come back into fashion, but it seemed like the sequin tube top is such a stereotype, that it's just too ridiculous. But no. Again, on an "urban" clothes website we find it for the actaul price of $32. But still. Really? Are the kids going to wear this awful thing? Send me your photos.

Well I'll Be Dipped... In Silver

Sometimes I have a problem with the whole set up of photo. Like with this one. The beehive hair-doo they have the model in is too much. I also think the model might have a tumor or implant gone awry in her butt. The one cheek is HUGE and the other, not so much. I want to know what this material feels like, it looks so silky and cooly metallic. The cowl neck in back is kinda 80's Dynasty retro. The whole look is something only Krystal Carrington could pull off. But for $220 this Oleg Cassini dress is quite the holiday bargain.

Zebra Prom Night

This would only look good if your prom's theme was "African Safari". It could happen people. The back is bad, I don't like dresses that allow for your bra by calling attention to it with a strap just as ugly as your bra's. I don't get it. The slit up the front looks allarmingly high, I wonder what it would be like to sit in this dress. Cross your legs! It's $398.

Oh But These Are BUBBLE Shorts

I've never paid more than $50 for a pair of shorts. I think they would have to be made of some kind of miracle fabric that made my legs and but look AMAZING instead of like a Gym Teacher. Anyway these are Bubble shorts, and I think based on the picture they have elastic around the bottom hem to create a fullness at the top of your thigh. Why is this a good idea? The tops of my thighs don't need fullness, trust me. But these shorts seriously cost $410 for a blue elastic waist on shorts made of 98% cotton, 2% spandex. The shirt sucks too, this is described as a Striped Batwing Top with a camisole underlay, all made of 88% viscose, 8% cupro, and 4% polyester. Price tag for the shirt? $660.